The Canonical list of non-unicyclist jokes

Barry Prescott (B.Prescott@computer-science.hull.ac.uk)
Tue, 15 Jun 93 19:09:40 BST

After a couple of months on one wheel I think I've heard just about
every comment directed at unicyclists. Probably world-wide.

They are, in reverse order of popularity:

3. `Wheelie'

I bet you can't do a wheelie!

2. `Impoverished Rider'

Couldn't you afford a proper bike?

1. `Stolen Wheel'

a) Oi! Someone pinched your back wheel!
b) Where's your other wheel gone?
b) You can't leave anything around here can you mate?

In order to be a purveyor of sweetness and light, my responses are
generally:

`Wheelie': But I *am* doing a wheelie! --- This tends to depress some
wags so I now tend to do a bunny hop instead and say "Howzat!?"

`Impoverished Rider': Inane grin, Shake head.

`Stolen Wheel': Act surprised as if I thought I was on two wheels.

After hearing these ad infinitum I'm in need of more responses. What
are your favourite come-back lines? Are there any jokes I've missed?

Barry